Posted in Customer Service, humor, office supplies, rewards programs

Change Needed

I started off the morning by doing laundry. I had enough quarters for one load. I had been thinking I’d wait for another day to do more, but then decided to finish everything today. To accomplish my worthy goals, I needed change.

I went to the corporate-owned supermarket to get it. Not too long ago, I had gotten quarters there and the cashier who gave them to me said, “If you ever need quarters, you come to us.” So I did. And today’s cashier said, “We can’t give you quarters.”

He suggested going to the Laundromat. You can feed bills into the machine and it spits out quarters. The machine had a sign: For Customers Only. I checked around to see if anyone was watching. I didn’t notice a video camera. I felt like a rebel as I gave the machine my bills.

While waiting for the washer to spin, I had time on my hands and used it to call a certain office supply store, where I bought my shredder last year. At the time, the cashier had told me that since I had a Rewards card, I would get a Reward. I love such promises. She said I’d get it December 31. In December I also bought some ink and recycled ink cartridges. The cashier told me I’d get credit for my purchase January 6. I could hardly wait.

December 31 came and went; no Reward. Ditto for January 6. I called to complain. Customer Service told me that 12/31 was incorrect; Feb. 1 was the correct date. As for the Jan. 6 credit, it would actually happen June 4.

Feb. 1 came and went; no Reward. I looked in my phone book for the store’s number. It showed only the number for Printing and Marketing Services. I called and asked for the main store. The man said, “This is the main store.” I said, “I thought it was Printing and Marketing.” He said, “This is Printing and Marketing.” I said, “My question is not about printing and marketing.” I told him what it was about. He said, “You need the main store.”

Next I spoke with Customer Service. The person said, “Oh, you will get a Reward June 4.” I noted that was the date for my ink credit. The coincidence was too much for her to handle; she referred me to the Rewards Desk.

When I called, the woman said, “I can’t access the log in page. I can’t access the account.” After everything I had been through, I was not surprised.. She said she’d keep trying. A few minutes later: success! She told me that I had $8 ink credit and it would expire Feb. 28.

Whoa. There is a big difference between Feb 28 and June 4. Just imagine if I had waited till June 4. No ink credit for me. I cannot imagine a sadder fate. As for my Reward, turns out such things are equal to two percent of the purchase and distributed in $5 increments. I did the math. My 2% = 1.98; no Reward for me.

For many years, I had customer servicey kinds of jobs. As I recall, it was key to communicate clearly so the customers would be happy and want to return. The misinformation I received made me long for change.

Funny how I started the day wanting that, too.



I am a rather obscure 14th C. poet, whose work has been translated into over thirty dialects of gibberish. I now spend my days translating from the gibberish into English and back again, as need be.

9 thoughts on “Change Needed

  1. I echo Sammee44’s message, having spent most of one day listening to mind-numbing repeated messages by robots, accompanied by non-stop, repeated unmusical ‘music,” hoping to talk to a real, live human being.

    Liked by 2 people

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