Posted in age 50, birthdays, forgetfulness, humor, sunglasses, tea

Enlightened At 50

I recently turned 50. It’s a lot like 49, except more … something.The correct word has flown out of my head.

I’ll move on to other things.

Tuesday I planned to go to the pool. I needed my sunglasses. They weren’t where I had left them, in their special corner. I searched under my jackets, on my bookshelf, inside my waist pack. No sunglasses. I knew they weren’t in my knapsack, but peered inside anyway. No sunglasses. I wore their understudy–my old pair. They were happy to be next in line. When I returned, I looked some more. Under my jackets, in my waist pack. No sunglasses. I knew they weren’t in my knapsack, but felt around beneath the plastic bags. And lo! there they were.

All was well.

Then Wednesday came along and I decided to make tea. I filled the kettle with water, turned on the burner, put tea in my mug. Sat down at the table. When the water boiled, I poured it into my mug. Since the water was too hot to drink, I left the room to get my book. The thought of reading my mystery while drinking tea made me feel cozy. When I returned to the kitchen, I glanced at the tea kettle. No flame beneath it. I must have forgotten to turn on the stove again. How could I make tea without boiling the water? I turned on the gas. I waited. When the water boiled, I turned off the gas, picked up the kettle, and was about to pour it into my mug, when I had an aha moment.

By the way, that word I forgot earlier?

Foolish.

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Posted in exercise, forgetfulness, humor, swimming, swimming pools

Kidnapped Swimsuit! Reward Offered!

Today A Certain Someone, whose name shall be kept anonymous to protect her identity, suffered a memory lapse post-laps and left her swimsuit behind in the shower. She discovered her loss when she arrived home and called 9-1-1-swimsuit. Thankfully, she got her suit back, but the situation reminded her of the terrible day her suit was kidnapped. She asked me to repost the account here.

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Kidnapped Swimsuit! Reward Offered!

Yesterday in the East Bay, a woman’s green swimsuit was taken from a shower at the local pool. The incident occurred post-swim. Whoever took the suit is now in a lot of hot water.

After swimming laps, Ms. Swimmer (who shall remain anonymous to protect her identity) suffered a memory lapse and forgot her suit in the shower. Hours went by before she realized her suit was missing.

The incident is creating waves across the community.

“This kidnapping doesn’t suit me at all,” said Chlo Reen, who swims daily at the pool. “I can’t wait for things to return to normal so I can get back in the swim of things.”

Detective Bak Stroke dove headfirst into the case, organizing a search committee to comb the area.

Meanwhile, a swim cap reward has been offered to the person who reveals the suit’s whereabouts.

“We’ll find the missing suit,” said Detective Stroke, “if all goes swimmingly.”