8

Cents & Centsibility

Find a penny, pick it up. All the day you’ll have good luck. I’ve collected a lot of pennies, which come in handy for buying tidbits, this and that, odds and ends. Consider me pro-penny.

Some people are anti-penny. They find pennies so useless and annoying, they’ve tossed them in the trash.

But over time, they may see the error of their ways.

I applaud small change. It shows people have come to their cent-ses.

5

A Shred of Truth (Part 3)

It seemed like a good idea at the time. I wanted to do some shredding. I had time on my hands because I had an appointment with someone who was scheduled to arrive between 9am and 1pm. Plenty of time to deal with the dreaded shredding pile.

I plugged in my shredder and added paper. Instead of going forward, it moved in reverse. Instead of the whole jaw being open, only the left part accepted paper. It was like it had a toothache. Soon after, its top grew warm. I cannot even tell you what it was like to want to shred and not be able to.

I called the office supply place to ask if they had the amazing shredder I had bought many years ago. The person said it was out of stock. He said I could order it over the phone. I wasn’t ready. When I called back, the next person said I couldn’t order over the phone. She said I could order online, call the 1-800 number, or order it in the store. I was ready to tear out my hair.

Speaking of which, I had tied it back so it wouldn’t get swallowed by the shredder. I put my hair in a tie that had lost its elasticity, so I wrapped it around and around my pony tail. Later, when I checked, it had gotten loose in my hair. I decided to switch it for one that still had elasticity. When I reached back for it, it was stuck to my hair. I had to cut it off, along with my hair.

Next I drew with color pencils. The points got worn down, so I sharpened them. At least, I thought, my sharpener was working. Except, just then, my green pencil got trapped inside.

By then it was 1pm and there was no sign of my visitor. I called his company and even though my appointment time was between 9am and 1pm, even though yesterday’s confirmation call was for 9am and 1pm, he had not gotten the memo.

However, I couldn’t wait any longer. I needed to get my shredder. If I ordered before 2, one customer sales rep had said, I could pick up my shredder by noon tomorrow. I went to the store. I was about to order it, when the salesperson suggested to his co-worker that he search in the backroom for the shredder I wanted. The co-worker looked like he would rather do anything else.

“Please,” I begged.

Next thing I knew, my shredder was walking toward me.

I couldn’t wait to get it home. I gave it so much paper. It didn’t complain once. It kept moving forward. It kept its cool.

6

My Sink Stopper Support Group

Sink or swim?

That was the first thing I thought when I woke this morning. I needed to decide whether to deal with my sink first or go swimming.

Sink, I think.

I sought guidance from my crystal ball: AKA the Internet. Within seconds of typing “how to unstick a stuck sink stopper,” dozens of articles appeared. Not only that, there were YouTube videos!

Let me back up.

Note to reader: my stuck sink stopper was not due to a backed up sink. It was due to an overeager  washer woman, AKA yours truly.

My pants had a stain and I wanted to soak them. I put the stopper in the sink, added water and soap, my pants, said the magic words, “scrub a dub dub,” and watched as the water flowed out. I readjusted the stopper, added water and soap, my pants, said the magic words. All was well.

Until later, when I couldn’t unstick my sink stopper. I tried and tried, but it was a big drain of my energy.

Today I read an article that said to take apart the sink. No thanks. Next I watched a video narrated by a woman with a soothing voice. She demonstrated the fine art of using a suction cup on the metal stopper. Easy peasy. I also found solace in the fact that her video had over 194,000 views. I wasn’t the only one dealing with a stuck sink stopper.

With my support group cheering me on, I went to the hardware store and purchased a small suction cup. It didn’t work.

I put on my thinking cap. Then got  my pocketknife and inserted its tip around the stopper’s metal edges. Success, at last!

I’ll make my own video. Unstick Stuck Sink Stopper will surely be a show stopper.

Coming soon to a theater near you!

6

A Crumby Tale

Just one week ago, I was walking through my favorite city.  I walked for three hours, not knowing where I was going, but having fun visiting streets and neighborhoods I hadn’t been to in awhile.

I landed exactly where I needed to be: the doorstep of a famous Italian bakery.

The display case enticed me with traditional American cookies, traditional Italian cookies, cupcakes, Napoleans, cannoli, cheesecake, princess cake, and an Italian sponge cake with some kind of cream filling. After much serious contemplation, I chose a cannoli, which tasted as good as those I was raised on and much better than the one I got on sale from my local supermarket.
All too soon it was gone. I hated to leave without trying a pignolia amaretti. It was like eating pure marzipan. I delighted in every bite. Until .. a piece fell to the sidewalk.
I gasped. My precious sweet! I looked at it, tempted to pick it up, but the germ-phobe in me said no. How downright crummy to think of missing out on one more tasty morsel. I nearly lost my cool right then and there.
Then I shrugged.
That’s the way the cookie crumbles.